TODAY WE CELEBRATE! 2.16.2019

ZEN TO ZANY
ZEN TO ZANY CAPTURES IT AGAIN. Please visit her site on Etsy.com

 

Celebrate! Celebrate! Dance to the music… (Three Dog Night)

CELEBRATE LINK ON YOUTUBE

Good morning,

Yesterday morning, when I took the dogs out for their morning walk… the sky, almost daylight bright from the light beaming from the moon and stars, looked as if someone had tossed hand fulls of cotton balls all about. It was an awesome sight! This morning, it’s dark and drizzling.

BUT there is “nothing” that can darken this day!

TODAY, I will be attending my youngest grand daughter’s birthday party. It will be the first time I will be able to appear in person, not via FACETIME!

Happy Dance!!  WOOT WOOT!!

 

Tomorrow, I will start the med change, for today I will revel in what I have been hoping to do for FIVE years!

TODAY, WE SHALL CELEBRATE LIFE WITH DANCING, SINGING, ENJOYING GRANDDAUGHTER HUGS AND EATING CAKE!!

#WINNING

xxxooxxxoooxxxoooxxxooo

 

Kind Regards and wishing you the best day- K

 

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Healthy is GREAT! But…. A Challenge to My Health Conscious Friends 2.13.2019

no matter how slow you go 2.13.19 blog post saying

 

Live healthy!! Eat right!

Exercise!!

This supplement helps with this and that and also gives a boost to, etc…

Take this med to help with your anxiety… GREAT! NOT!!

These days, so many individuals are suffering from high blood pressure! Almost every

healthy supplement states- will help lower your blood pressure.

Fantastic, RIGHT?

WRONG!

There are some of us who have a naturally low blood pressure.

Mine happens to be around 90/60!

If I lower it anymore, I’ll be on the floor!  ha!

My standard heart rate equals 57. Not too bad, eh?

 

Walking around in a dazed, weakened stupor is not only dangerous

but DEFINITELY NOT FUN!

Interestingly enough, as most of my friends are being told to watch their salt intake,

I have instructions to increase mine. Hey! What can I say? SORRY!

Much like my dad, I have always been a pepper lover!! If it’s not covered in black,

delectable, coarse speckles, it needs more!  😉

 

Yesterday, for Valentine’s day and my 57th (eek!) birthday, I had a scheduled primary care visit.

**He is literally taking me off my 12 year anti-anxiety regiment of  1.5 xanax in am, .5- 2 hours later, .5- 2 hours later and .5 at bedtime- cold turkey and switching me to 1mg of lorazepam twice per day, and upping my 25 mg Topiramate to twice per day. 

I checked with the local pharmacist. She is not impressed that he is having me quit xanax cold turkey, but said is should not be life threatening. GOOD NEWS!

Unfortunately, I will be experiencing withdrawals. OH SHUCKS!

I am researching, things to have on hand for healthy cleansing/nutritious smoothies, hydration and whatever else I can find.

 

Here is THE CHALLENGE for all my

HEALTH CONSCIOUS friends out there:

Find me some healthy lifestyle foods and smoothies,

that will “NOT DECREASE” my blood pressure, 

PLUS

 Any HELPFUL TIPS you can give me, to get through this transition

will be way beyond appreciated. (I am literally scared sh*tless)

 

Anxiously, awaiting your comments!!

 

Kind Regards and Happy Friday- K

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

After the Rooster Crows 2.6.2019

IMG_9799

Good morning.

Happy Wednesday!

According to Siri, my I-phone, Troutman, NC should have a temperature 

Around 70 degrees today! yahoo!

 

Do you have a morning routine?

I do.

Start the coffee, walk the dogs, feed the fur children, Marbre’, my cat, then my beloved canines, Chief and Abby.

Pour a cup of coffee.

Pop open the computer, a fresh word doc and type or grab a pen, my journal and write.

There is something about putting pen to paper, I find calming and soothing.

Early Morning Journaling

My scrawled words

Enrich the paper

Wtih sentiments, thoughts and wishes.

From dreams, to logging life’s events.

Whether fond memories, frustration or woes.

Releasing all upon a blank sheet,

Creates an inner harmony 

 No other early morning

 Activity can beat.

Writing or typing allows me 

An opportunity to

 Makes sense of some,

Chuckle at others,

Or allows me, to set free

Any negativity from yesterday. 

A clean slate, 

Enables my heart,

My soul, my mind

To open, be trusting, 

And accept 

All the possiblities,

And potential,

Of a fresh, new day!

 

 I am thinking of creating a journal with a large variety of life’s pictures, from a group of friends photos scattered throughout. The clicks can be used for writing exercises or for the viewing pleasure of the person who still journals. What do you think?

Kind Regards and #winning – K

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Own the Day! 1.31.2019

 

orangeflowersfromghehauntedhouse

 

Good morning all. 

 19 degrees here in North Carolina! We are extremely lucky considering other parts of the country are experiencing sub-zero temps. 

I wanted to share a little something I wrote a few weeks ago. When you endure days with anxiety, panic and depression, you often have to reach deep to find your strength.

Writing brings my inner strength to the forefront of my mind and helps me  grab onto the life I deserve! Putting my thoughts on paper, re-enforces the positive and gives me a little extra push, for my continuous journey forward.

Part of #winning is learning what it takes to be your own cheerleader!

 

Own the Day

‘Own the day or the day could own you.’- Kallie Knight

She was back! The drug, the doctor had prescribed day before yesterday, had taken her to a euphoria buzz, onto fog brain, then about 12 hours later, weakness, severe headache, heart palpitations accompanied by a sore throat.

Thursday had been a waste.  She couldn’t sleep. She couldn’t think clearly enough to perform the simple task of washing the dishes.

Damn doctors, she thought. Why can’t they listen? She had told her new primary care physician, that anything he prescribed needed to be the lowest dose then divided by half.  Thank heavens she had taken half a pill, 10 mg of the 20 mg prescription.

The drug? ESCITLOPRAM. It was supposed to enhance her mood, work with her current depression med. Now, she knew, when and IF she attempted it again, she was would only take 5mg.

Right now, she had responsibilities. Her dogs, prepping to finally, after a month and a half of living in an interim place, to MOVE! A REAL apartment!  The place she would call home.

K smiled as she  looked forward to hanging her hat!

YES! Today she would start to move a few things.  Luckily, her daughter who currently lived there, had the second bathroom cleaned out. Today, she would pick the items that could fit into that room. Only, fifteen minutes away from her current location it was like the difference from night and day.

Troutman, NC was a slice of heaven! Acres of fields, open space with the bonus of horses and cows, down the road. It was the one place, her whole being felt at home.

 

 

FINALLY, she felt HOPEFUL!

Doing the best one can, under any circumstance is what earns a person the title of survivor.

Feeling intense relief, she sipped her morning coffee, and felt exhilarated!

She KNEW-

TODAY, SHE OWNED THE DAY!

headinthecloudstroutmannc

zentozanythingsyoulearninastorm

Compliments of Zen to Zany!!

 

Kind Regards and #winning – K

 

1.29.19 AHHH WIFI AND LIFE! (2 min read)

febuary girls t-shirt

HELLO EVERYONE!

Finally, I am back!

So much has happened, I will attempt to give you the Reader’s Digest version:

First of all I would like to say, I have missed every single one of you. Sounds crazy, but I love being a part of the blogging family!  Sending out warm wishes and K hugs all around!!  🙂

I am finally  moved into my new apartment! Thank you very much to my daughter, her new hubby and brothers! Happy dance going on here!!

7penske truck 1.27.2019

Back in the country again! Yes! Troutman, NC is a little bit country.

When I walk the dogs early in the morning, I can hear the cows mooing down the street!

Abby and Chief, feel quite at home! Lot’s of grass, space and a whole lot of new smells. What more could a beloved fur child ask for?

chief and abby exploring at their new house

These last few days have been  frustrating, eye-opening and a celebratory time.

Celebration: Moved and a whole bedroom of boxes to explore! Wifi is back! We feel extremely at home in our new place. One neighbor even brought me some of his specialty chicken as a welcome to the neighborhood! Too cool!

My grandaughter started a new Christian private school yesterday! A glorious opportunity for her to receive a wonderful education!

Eye opening:  I have a new primary physician! He was very intelligent and I loved the overall feel of the office. They called me “Miss K”.

I got my overdue eye exam done. New glasses on the way!

One downside, I have the beginning stages of cataracts! A bit of a scare for me.  Macular degeneration is hereditary, and when my grandmother, soon after retirement had one of hers removed, she lost her sight in that eye. With an inoperable cataract in the other eye eventually she became legally blind. Something, I have had a subconscious fear of for over twenty years.

Frustration: I have one daily medication that I take, that I am having a difficult time finding a doctor to prescribe. It is not controlled in North Carolina as it was up North. The frustrating aspect- I have to somehow prove I am not a drug addict! Guilty until you prove yourself innocent. To prove one’s innocence you have to get an appointment.  That is the challenge! No one will let me in the door so that I can do so. I will NOT give up, I cant! But definitely a PIA!!

#Winning: I AM HERE! 

I am getting settled!

My dreams are coming true.

blue skies 15.19

Blue skies babee!!

A click from my walk at the new place the other night!

red sky sunset with copyright from my second day here!!

 

“With confidence you have won even before you have started.” – Marcus Garvey

Since I have arrived at this part of my life journey, I have proven, once again, push on through your panic and you can live the life you deserve!!

Just close your eyes and DO IT!

Kind Regards and #winning – K

 

 

 

 

Happy New Year 2019

Happy 2019 Here We Go!!

img_6121

No resolutions did I make

Except each day

When I awake,

I’ll enjoy my coffee

With a smile.

While looking forward to

What each day unfolds.

 

 

I am driving the vehicle,

to my own destiny.

The possibilities are endless.

img_8100-1

I wish you much happiness and success in the coming year.

 

Kind Regards and #winning – K

 

*** Photography copyrighted and compliments of K of TheBlackWallBlog.

 

NC Winter is Rain 12.30.18

QUICK!  NAME (Or sing), SONGS with RAIN in the lyrics…. GO!

“It never rains in California, but girl don’t they warn ya, it pours, man it pours.”

“Rainy nights In Georgia…”

Singing in the Rain…”

 

IMG_8509.PNG

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Yesterday, I awoke, to gray skies but by the afternoon, it was blue skies and upper fifties! All that vitamin D lifts my mind, body and soul.

Today, I awoke to a heavy chest. I opened my eyes and stared straight into Marbre’ Mitten’s eyes. Sure enough, my beloved, chill cat, had laid herself across my chest. She positioned herself perfectly so that our faces were less than an inch apart.  Playing on the meow radio, was her sweet, peaceful purring song. 

Chief, Abby and I had our usual 2:30 a.m. trek. Opening the front door, we discovered the beginning of little sprinkles.  A gentle rain as opposed to the torrential downpour Friday. That caused flooding in a few areas closer to the coast.

Chief doesn’t mind, though we all know he prefers snow. It’s poor little Abby. As a Yorkie-poo, much closer to the ground, Chief often leads her into puddles that soak her belly.  She’s a trooper. She just wades on through. Perhaps she needs some colorful boots? (Moments like this, I would love to be a cartoonist with the ability to sketch that visual!)

We walked a few feet west and I noticed, what looked like a baby skunk crossing the road to the grassy hill on the other side. It didn’t quite waddle like a skunk. I was almost sure I saw black and white stripes but… Then I noticed there was a larger one of the same species, already in the grass. The bigger one seemed to have more of a white fur base. Peering through the lights of the street lamps, their movement was different than a skunk. Their shape and the gleaming eyes reminded me of possum? I really don’t know.  Research time! (Input welcomed!)

Checked with my daughter she is saying possum. Sounds like it was a great idea I turned around. They seem to be a bit aggressive towards canines. Eeek!

Happy Monday all!!  

 ** Happy Almost 2019!!**

 

Kind Regards and #winning – K

 

**Photography copyrighted and compliments of K of TheBlackwallblog,

Dec 2018 with Text2pic App for quote

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Out of My Comfort Zone

GPS shows me where to go

Otherwise, it’s two dogs

One cat and me.

Not a familiar place

Nor even a smiling face

Do I recognize.

I search for beauty

Whenever I can,

Such as the glorious blooms

Next door

At a place that looks

Like it could be haunted.

Yet no fear is felt

When I walk by,

Only a soulful peace.

A welcome contrast to my

Inner doubt and turmoil.

Loneliness keeps knocking.

Outwardly you’d not know

Of my tears shed behind

Closed doors.

I keep pushing forward

Thru panic’s swirling fog

And depression’s darkness.

Late day migraines are

Currently my reward.

The mind’s grand tricks

To force my surrender.

My will grows weary,

Yet I push on

Determined.

❤️💃🏻💃🏻❤️

Kind Regards- K

🤗

Photography via K at TheBlackWallBlog Dec 2018.

Boundaries and no answers. 12.16.18

Dealing with changes is challenging no matter what your age.

At 56 after waiting 8 very long years for my son, a vet and I, to find a middle ground, I decided to make that move from NH to NC.

Sadly/gladly, thanks to my daughter, the day we packed the truck for the move, I saw my son for the first time in two years.

He stated, you’ve never came to visit me. Interesting statement considering I had been told his home was off limits.

Trying for a mom hug, the response? “You start any shit and I’ll get in my truck and leave.”

Painful? Hell yes!

Am I still sad? Definitely!

Can I continue to keep my life on hold? No!

He’s angry about life.

I’ve researched, tried at least 20 plus ways to approach him.

It doesn’t work!

I’ve been in NC, barely a week and now I’m getting angry texts. Some random subjects that make zero sense, others make sense but, why now?

He just threatened me with not being in my life if I don’t give a particular item of mine, that I had planned on giving him.

Uhm, hello?

He would have had it the day I moved. Unfortunately in texting with him a few days earlier he informed me he wasn’t going to be there, so I packed it.

Three guesses which box? Honestly, I don’t know.

My dad was a correctional officer in the 1940-50’s. I have his badge. My son followed a similar route, not the same state. Yes, it would be awesome for him to have it.

But he’s accusing me of hiding it from him. Sigh.

So after numerous ugly texts that started last night. Then continued into today.

I blocked him.

Then got physically ill.

😢

He text me a different way.

“You blocked me?”

I didn’t answer.

I’m out of answers.

My son always says-

A MOTHER NEVER GIVES UP!

He’s Right!

I JUST PUT MYSELF IN TIMEOUT!

❤️

“It’s okay to be scared, but you have to get out there, open up, love, make mistakes, learn, be stronger, and start all over again. -Unknown

Kind Regards and

Moving forward- K

😎

Photography compliments of K of TheBlackWallBlog 12.18

Shameful Behavior

I am witness

Of what you have done

To her.

Inflicting her heart

With the agonizing pain

Of ten-thousand deaths

With your manipulative

Ways.

Making her life decisions

Without consultation,

Imprisoning her in a world

Of self doubt.

Tempting her with

glimpses and promises

of your love and warmth.

Then yanking them away

Knocking her off her feet.

Time and again.

Never allowing

The dust of comfort

And peace to settle.

You are an idiot

Undeserving of her

Unselfish gifts of

Heart, warmth, caring

And love.

It’s simple.

Passive aggressive

Behavior is your specialty.

A person’s life decisions

Belong to them.

Freedom of choice

Through communication

And collaboration with

Knowledge of all the facts.

The only existing copyright

Of creating circumstances

For blind lifestyle choices

Belong to God and the

universe.

To think all her pain

Was avoidable,

If only you were who

You portrayed yourself

To be.

Unfortunately, the scars

Of your making

Will remain forevermore.

My only hope is

That I have saved her

In time.

As for you,

I know she wishes you

The best

And will always be dumb

Enough to hold a tiny spark

Of hope.

For she is a beautiful

believer in the power

Of good in everyone.

❤️

“Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.”-

-Oprah Winfrey

The one who is meant for you encourages you to be your best, but still loves and accepts you at your worst.” – Unknown

Kind Regards as I help a friend – K

❤️🌎❤️

Can You Hear Me? 9.20.18

Last week was

National Suicide Prevention Week.

So many people

On numerous social sites,

Posted their support,

The hot lines.

Did you absorb

What it’s truly about?

Did you actually read

And understand the signs?

***

Can you hear me

Begging for help

By my silence?

Did you notice

I’m keeping to myself

These days?

Have you seen a dullness

That replaced a sparkle

In my eyes?

Have you wondered

About my flash anger

When there’s nothing

For me to be mad about?

Can you tell

By my hollowed cheeks

And clothing grown too big,

That I’ve lost my appetite?

Can you hear the silence,

Since I stopped answering

my phone?

Have you noticed

Dirty coffee mugs

In my sink,

Piled higher each day?

Do you see

The unopened bills

Stacked higher, on

The kitchen table?

You say I’m so strong.

Can work thru anything.

Yes, once I was!

I’ve searched

For my strength,

It’s disappeared.

Can you hear me?

The dogs can.

No worries,

They’ll alert the neighbors

Once I’m gone.

Will you look back,

And hear me then?

☀️🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾☀️

Make sure you know

What to look for,

take notice of your

Friends and family.

If their is an

Unexplained behavioral

Change.

Don’t just chalk it up,

To your knowledge

There has been

” a little” extra stress

In their life.

In a calm manner,

Ask questions.

Remember, just because

They’ve weathered tough

times before, doesn’t mean

this time it’s the same.

Everything maybe okay!

They may just be stumbling

Right now.

But if you don’t ask

The questions

How will you know

For sure?

Kind Regards and hugs – K

❤️🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾☀️

Mom’s America Has Forgotten

Happy Thursday!

Yes, today is K’s Blog recommendation day, I’m working on them. Stay tuned!

BUT FIRST!

In the last year, something I FEARED was true.

Has PROVED to be true!

THE FORGOTTEN MOMS.

That’s right.

WHO are they?

The majority seem to be woman in their 50s.

Educated, smart, witty and funny.

They have raised their children and are now experiencing empty nest syndrome.

In their 20s, 30s and 40s, they kicked ass and beat down the doors so that their daughters could have the same pay as their male co-workers.

Whether it be due to illness, businesses closing or?

They are struggling.

Suddenly, due to their age, they aren’t quick to be employable anymore. (Yup that’s illegal) but still true!

Because, they don’t have children at home nor have a drinking or drug problem…

They are not eligible for most state or federal programs

They can get, possibly, assistance (approximately 10%), in fuel and electric.

I know there ARE some financial programs to help with medical. ONE plus !

Their homes are ALMOST paid for, and they may drive a nice car.

OOPS! sorry, that’s too much value for any type of assistance!

They can get some groceries at the local food bank. TWO in the plus column!

They are too YOUNG, to touch their retirements without a large decrease in the monthly payment plus will experience a 10- 20% tax hit for withdrawing before retirement age.

They have most likely taken care of and buried both parents.

Grandparents are gone.

Their children don’t want them in their home because they still have the “family” pets! Or they just don’t care! (Sad, but true!)

These loving mom’s have helped their children, when they could.

And suddenly,

THEY ARE ALONE!

What’s the answer?

1) Take a 15 dollar an hour cut in pay to work and still not be able to cover their bills?

2) Become alcoholics and drug addicts so they are more likely to be eligible for state federal help?

That’s if they don’t end up living on the street first!

These smart savvy women are selling everything they can.

Researching the internet for passive incomes and praying!

Some are opening their homes and renting rooms.

Hoping they don’t get screwed over by a tenant that doesn’t pay or destroys half their house!

( That last one comes from personal experience! I’m still attempting to fix the damage on a zero budget so I can rent again!)

THEY/WE are fighters!

THEY/WE have HEART!

So America, I ask YOU!

What ARE YOU GOING to do about it?

The CLOCK IS TICKING!

Kind Regards

And kicking & screaming -K

🤔

Pic and quote compliments of Text2Pic app.

Depression 9.3.18

Dark clouds of bleakness

Beckoned.

It’s evil gnarled fingers

Grabbed for my

Exposed ankle.

I fought to climb upwards.

Upwards towards

A glorious deep blue sky.

I screamed, “HELP ME!”

No one was near.

My cry for help

Was consumed

By a hole of nothingness.

Dark clouds of bleakness

LUNGED.

It grasped my foot.

I felt myself starting to

descend.

Above, sunshine appeared,

It’s golden rays

encompassed

My outstretched hand.

Slowly, the sunshine

Inched me upwards.

The dark clouds of

bleakness lost it’s hold.

Swiftly, plummeted

And out of sight.

I awoke, to find the

early morning sun

shining through my

bedroom window.

❤️🌎❤️

Kind Regards and #winning – K

How We Treat Others

In your journey of life

What is your aspiration?

To assemble or

Dismantle?

Build up or

Knock down?

A selfish person

Will attempt to

Demoralize with

Sharp tongued negativity.

A giving individual

Shows respect

Speaking

With sweet motivation,

Encouragement and

positivity.

So I ask,

What is your aspiration?

click on above for a little something special just for you.

💕

Kind Regards and hugs – K

Featured Blogs Discovered 7.5.18

Here comes the sun!
Zen to Zany!

❤️🌎❤️

Click and view these awesome discoveries!

☀️ Krish motivational Blog

☀️ Didis Art Design

☀️ CHIRASREEWRITES

☀️ Dreamy damsel Blog

☀️ Benaqiba

☀️ Ididnthavemyglasseson KS Beth

☀️ S.E.A. Sara Ackerman author

☀️ Message in Stanza

☀️ Lavender Life and Everything Nice

☀️ Pretty Plus andProud

An awesome week filled with, Learning, smiling, interaction and making new friends! It’s was tough to choose only a few!

Enjoy!

Let me know what you think! ❤️🌎❤️

Kind Regards and relishing the moment – K

🦉🇺🇸

Here comes the sun photography compliments of K’s backyard, 7.2018 🤣