In loving memory! 8.28.18

In loving memory Rocklin D Webb 8/28/1999. ❤️

Suicide leaves so many unanswered questions. Please if you are going through a bad time, ask for help.

Love and hugs to all – K ❤️

Advertisements

Always You

In the beginning,

You were closer

Than anyone could ever be.

Little flutters, kicks and

Finally, I held you.

Then every night, up at 3.

To feed, rock and nurture.

My love surrounded us

To keep you safe and warm.

Back to work,

I had to go,

Throughout my day

Constantly, worrying

Wondering.

What were you

Doing, thinking,

Eating?

Often I would cry.

Until I rushed to pick you up,

My eves were spent

Holding, hugging, rocking

Singing you a lullaby,

Until you finally slept.

Lovingly I peered

Upon my sleeping babe.

And time continued on.

Seasons passed.

🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷

Days flew by

We tracked your height

With an old yard stick

A mark upon the door trim wood.

We were close

Life wasn’t perfect

But felt fabulous.

And Oh so good!

Soon you were off to school.

Everyday, I wondered

What you were

Doing, thinking.

As the sun went down

In our world.

After homework was done.

We sat around the

Kitchen table,

You would share your stories.

We’d laugh and giggle.

Often,

We’d rush to your

Baseball or basketball

Practice or a game.

As my day would

come to a close,

I would wonder

What was I doing

Right or wrong?

Was I teaching you enough?

Giving you life’s resources

To be

Accomplished in your life?

Often I searched for answers,

As I laid there

Trying to sleep.

And time went on.

Seasons passed.

Now,

As the sun gently rests

At the end of my day.

Random texts arrive.

Phone calls,

I’m blessed with

Pictures in the mail.

You share

what you are

Doing and thinking.

I am proud of what

You are accomplishing,

In your daily life.

When I go to bed at night.

I smile and am

Ever so thankful.

Knowing it’s time

And patience

That has kept us growing closer.

Though distance keeps us apart.

As the years go by

And the seasons pass.

As it has always been

Since your arrival.

No matter how old you are

Or where your life

Might take you,

In my heart

The truest love.

Will always belong

To you.❤️

Kind Regards and thinking about my children -K

❤️

Photography compliments and copyrighted by BGage & K of TheBlackWallBlog.

Authentic

Sometimes 

Sometimes 

No matter how two people feel

It doesn’t work.

Is it timing?

Is it life perspective?

Is it fear?

Deep down they truly love you

In you heart you truly love them.

And still 

There’s a missing puzzle piece.

You can’t finish putting together

the masterpiece 

Because there is something missing.

It’s not identifiable 

It just is.

You waste hours, days, months 

Wondering what you did wrong?

Wondering why you were happy

Yet often you weren’t.

There was a hole of pain.

Something not quite fulfilled.

Lack of true faith

In each other?

Bad timing?

Eventually the pain 

Of staying

Is equal to

The pain 

Of walking away.

All because of

Something.

Sometimes.

Kind Regards -K
Photography copyrighted and compliments of BGage & Theblackwallblog
Circle

Thankfulness Week # 11

1380410_10201637439475250_1775914446_n
Hello ol' friends, it's been awhile

Hard to believe 

That once again it has come

Another snow fall, this winter's first 

Yes, again it did appear

So gentle and so pure 

It covered Fall's browned leaves 

With tiny petite white fluff.

Our favorite magical time of year,

Yes, it would have been more dear

If the ones who knew me best

Could have stood along beside me

Though in my heart and mind

They forever will be near.

Ahh yes, the Holiday’s are once again upon us.

How many times have we read the words?

Through our lives, so many people, friends and family

have joined us in our traditional celebrations.

And the years go by….

You wake up one day, with only beautiful memories

of those that have now passed.

How do you handle it?

Well you know what I am going to say,

THE CHOICE IS ALWAYS UP TO YOU!

As for me, I raise my glass of wine in celebration!

How blessed I am to have such glorious memories to cherish.

“Here’s to the good ol’ days, to the present I am here to enjoy

and to the future of grand things to come!”

Kind Regards and feeling thankful – K

Haddons ALL NEW WRITER’S QUOTE CHALLENGE

Elicit
Chaotic

52 Weeks of Thankfulness 8, 9, 10

I have started to believe that once again I might just be able to allow myself to make some goals!

Thank you universe for opening up unexpected windows to allow me to start pushing out some negatives. 

I still have work to do but a first step is a momentous occasion! 

“Develop an attitude of gratitude, and give thanks for everything that happens to you, knowing that every step forward is a step toward achieving something bigger and better than your current situation.” -Brian Tracy


Isn’t it wonderful how more and more retailers are closing their doors on Christmas so their employees can have family time!


#winning all the way!!

What are YOU THANFUL FOR??

Kind Regards and feeling

        thankful for you-K

52 Weeks of Thankfulness #7

20161023_151349FALLINTER HALLOWEEN SEASON.jpg
Photo copyrighted and compliments of LGB

It’s one of those extra seasons in New England, FALLINTER! 

When that white stuff makes it’s first appearance,

 little ghosts and goblins show up at your door

with a mixture of little voices cheerfully calling out “Trick or Treat”.

I am thankful for each of those little buggers

and their parents that have carried on the hallows eve tradition

of still trusting a friendly neighbor to give out candy. 🙂

 

I am truly thankful that during Fallinter I don’t have to shovel!

For that pretty white stuff that shows up, you know that “S” word…

makes a brief appearance and generally by the next day it is gone.

 

Ahhh, yes “Fallinter” the betwixt, between magical time year….

 

Boo HA HA!!

 

Kind Regards and wishing you a safe and Happy Halloween – K

 

 

 

Transformation

HADDON MUSINGS 52 WEEKS OF THANKFULNESS

52 Weeks Of Thankfulness #6

I am thankful for the 4 seasons in New England. 

Having had the wonderful opportunity to have lived in Oregon and

Arizona, though I embraced their unique beauty,

My heart  still belongs to New England.

Fall is my favorite,

Spring comes second

and Winter and Summer tie for 3rd.

 

**Shared via  pics of our New England backyard 

along with a couple of Zen to Zany’s

thought provoking prints…

 

**Pictures are compliments of L.G.B –

aka: “Mr October” in the 2017 AGCO Calendar.

 Check it out if you have a chance.

Sorry, it’s his prize winning photo, not him in his Speedo… smirk.

20160924_150105

16-1-1

16-2-1

16-2

14589981_1292399790792355_853548936579799684_o

Keep moving forward one step at a time…. 

 

14610926_1082171771895569_3522967027979604783_n

 

 

14568236_1085341531578593_2944772556541415987_n

 

 

Kind Regards and feeling ghoulishly thankful- K

 

HADDON MUSINGS

WordPress – Local

 

One of the Lucky…

As I was laying in the ER the other day getting a bag of fluids due to some gastro-something virus thing I caught at work. My blood work results returned and a very relieved PA said to me “You know you’re one of the lucky ones.”

“One of the lucky ones. One of the lucky ones.”  Those 5 words  have swirled round and round in  my head for the last 24  hours. 

That statement made me glad AND sad. 

1) Due to back to back bouts of c-diff earlier this year I can no longer take anti- biotics. One of those “helpful” lil’ buggers caused my c- diff!  

But that’s not why I”m saddened by “being one of the lucky ones.”

2) I lost my job and almost everything I own due to that terrible super bug .

But that’s not why I”m saddened by “being one of the lucky ones.”

3)  The  fact that less than 80% of people are cured by the C-diff drugs doctors prescribe, (including me).

 THAT makes me sad! 

The fact that I spent numerous days researching alternatives, digging into studies, reading blogs and comments, digging, praying only to sleep a few hours and start again making notes, trying this, trying that until FINALLY! I started feeling better .

 I’m proud I did it 

Unfortunately the regular doctors and primary care physicians aren’t mentiong any of these alternatives.

The pharmaceutical companies are going to fight, probably already are against the answers, the discoveries of what is working ! THAT makes me SAD AND MAD!! 

I want MORE lucky ones! 
I wrote about C-diff and my trials in my post The Unwanted visitor! I didn’t know if it was truly going to work then. 

NOW I know, IT DID!

In my next  post I will reiterate in a quick 3 minute(ish) read what to try!  AND NOT one of those disgusting sounding turmeric enemas IS part of it! Ewwwww!

 I shiver,quiver and feel gross just thinking about it. I apologize to those getting by on that method. But ugh!

One, stipulation if you try what I did. Keep me posted on your progress. Comment comment comment! 

THEN PAY IT FORWARD!  

Spread the word!

SHARE and be a part of my quest for MORE “ONE OF THE  LUCKY ONES!”

Kind Regards 

and often long winded-K

All contents of this post is copyrighted by K at The Black Wall Blog. It cannot be professionally published without written consent.

52 Weeks Of Thankfulness #5

20160926_184309-sunset-by-lgb-9

I am thankful for God and the Universe for showing me kindness from strangers that I had no idea existed.  There are  people that care and see those things you try to hide from the outside world. I call them angels on earth.

I am so thankful for those friends old and new that have been by my side since February. They have helped me thru some rough times, never did they falter. They caught me off guard as they just showed up.   Sometimes, you don’t have to ask for help, a higher power does it for you.

img_5999

I am thankful for the lesson, that starts with that “H” word. There may come a moment when you have no other choice. And that is okay.  Having an illness that had my body literally starving itself left me weak and often unable to get out of bed for days at a time.  I was scared. I picked up the phone. It was difficult. I did it!

 

black-and-white-abby-with-curves

I am thankful for my faithful companions! They are full of love that never fails.

I am thankful that I found the strength to start the path to rebuild my muscle tone and the inner determination that I was NOT going to lose the fight.

I am thankful that, NOW, I have a chance to pay  their kindness forward.

 

I am thankful for the blogging world that kept me sane.

(Okay! You got me on that one, almost sane!)  “GRINNING!”

 

Let it all sound sappy to some.

I’ll walk a mile in their shoes if they would care to walk a  mile in mine!

(One condition: They get to go back to February, March and April and try it!)

Insert- “SNICKER and EVIL chuckle with a wink!”-here.  😉

 

Sing it with me now!!

James Taylor “You’ve got a Friend”

 

…If the sky above you should turn dark and full of clouds
and that old north wind should begin to blow,
keep your head together and call my name out loud.
Soon I will be knocking upon your door.
You just call out my name, and you know where ever I am
I’ll come running to see you again.
Winter, spring, summer, or fall, all you have to do is call and I’ll be there.

 

#WINNING!!

 

Kind Regards and feeling beyond grateful, thankful and blessed – K

HADDON MUSINGS

 

52 Weeks of Thankfulness #4

IMG_5902 (1).jpg

This morning I  received news from home  the temperature  was down to 44 degrees! Yikes!

Here in the south I am spending my time escaping the heat and humidity  by bouncing in and out of  air conditioning. Quite the contrast.

#1 I am thankful  for the time I am spending with my daughter and little granddaughter.

No matter what the weather, 2 1/2 year old Grandma K hugs are the best.

I am truly blessed to have such a wonderful opportunity to feel those sweet little arms around my neck with special  just because kisses.

 

img_5966vintage-wleaves-and-watermark

 

 

#2  9/11 – I  am thankful that my cousin tends to run late. She was late that day we will NEVER FORGET. Therefore, she was not in the building. Since, no one has ever given her any flack about her tendency to be tardy.

In honor of the 15 year anniversary of that fateful day, I decided  to try an experiment.

I  sat stationary  on the front porch, as the breeze whipped about the American Flag , I took random shots.  Here are some of the results.

img_5990img_5940img_5980img_5939img_5943img_5931img_5935

9/11 Quotes

 

Kind Regards and feeling thankful for special moments – K

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

HADDON MUSINGS 52 WEEKS OF THANKFULLNESS
Fragile

52 Weeks of Thankfulness #3

14188518_1050704061709007_3342602037988939079_o
Zen to Zany- Tell her K sent you. 🙂

Today, I am grateful for a couple of things:

  Three years ago I put in an application for a job I truly wanted.

Last week, out of the blue they called me for an interview. 

Well, I am thankful for the chance to have interviewed and 

received an offer from the company to take the job. It came at

a time I truly needed it.

Someone is watching over me. 🙂

********************************************************

This week I had a chance to chat with an old friend.

We have not spoken but once in 26 years.

(She is battling cancer for the 2nd time.)

We talked for over 2 hours…

Time has no affect on true friendship! 

 

Have a wonderful week!!

 

Kind Regards and feeling blessed – K

 

 

 

https://haddonmusings.com/2016/08/29/52-weeks-of-thankfulness-week-10/

52 Weeks of Thankfulness #2

14102935_1045701642209249_5535153856744557213_o
Zen to Zany- look for her On Facebook and Etsy.com

 

I come from a long line of “fretters”, aka nail biters and  worry warts. lol

I am thankful for the experiences in my life that

lead me to opportunities which taught me  the meaning of-

WISE MIND.

The practice of various things/exercises that help to maintain balance,

understand mindfulness and help one continue to strive to:

“STAY IN THE NOW.”  

Blessed, as I continue to grow and find other outlets for every day stresses.  

I am no expert! The goal is to keep working on it and

each day feel more confident that

I am moving in the right direction:

FORWARD. 

 

wise mind

“Your attitude is like a box of crayons that color your world.

Constantly color your picture gray,

and your picture will always be bleak.

Try adding some bright colors to the picture by including humor,

and your picture begins to lighten up.”

~Allen Klein

 

Kind regards and feeling thankful – K

 

 

HADDON MUSINGS 52 Weeks of Thankfulness